What Is Birth Trauma? Signs You Might Be Overlooking

Hey, Shameless Mamas - Let’s Talk about Maternal Mental Health

You may have a healthy baby. Your doctors may have called the birth a success. You may even be “doing fine” from the outside. But something doesn’t feel right. Maybe you're having nightmares, intrusive thoughts, or trouble connecting with your baby. Or maybe you're just carrying a heavy sense of unease you can’t explain.

You might be experiencing birth trauma—even if no one told you that’s what it is.

What Is Birth Trauma?

Birth trauma is an emotional and psychological response to a distressing or frightening experience during childbirth. It isn’t limited to emergency C-sections or complicated deliveries. Many high-functioning new moms develop trauma symptoms after births that were medically "routine."

Trauma isn't defined by what happened, but by how your body experienced it. If your birth felt unsafe, disempowering, or out of your control, those experiences can live in your nervous system long after the birth is over.

You Can Have Birth Trauma If:

• You felt ignored or dismissed by medical staff

• You feared for your or your baby’s life

• Your birth plan wasn’t respected

• You experienced physical pain that felt unbearable or unmanaged

• You underwent an unexpected medical intervention (even if necessary)

• You felt emotionally alone or unsupported during delivery

And yes—you can still have birth trauma even if your baby is perfectly healthy.

Signs You Might Be Overlooking

Some signs of birth trauma are obvious—like flashbacks or panic attacks. But most are subtle and misattributed to stress, “baby blues,” or personality.

1. You Replay the Birth in Your Mind

You obsess over what happened or what could have gone differently. Flashbacks may intrude unexpectedly, especially during quiet moments or when you're trying to sleep.

2. You Feel Numb or Disconnected

You go through the motions but feel emotionally flat. You might even feel detached from your baby—guilt-inducing but common in trauma responses.

3. You Dread Medical Settings

Postpartum visits, future pregnancies, or even seeing your OB can trigger panic, nausea, or avoidance.

4. You’re Hypervigilant or Overwhelmed by Anxiety

You check the baby constantly. You fear something terrible is about to happen. You may struggle to rest, even when help is available.

5. You Carry Unspoken Shame

You tell yourself you’re weak or ungrateful. You feel like you “should be over it by now,” especially because everyone keeps saying how "lucky" you are.

Why Birth Trauma Often Goes Undiagnosed

In a culture that prioritizes healthy babies over maternal well-being, birth trauma gets missed—especially among high-achieving, educated moms.

Too many postpartum women are told their emotional pain is just hormones or new mom anxiety. But when distress lingers past the early weeks, interferes with your functioning, or isolates you emotionally, you deserve more than just reassurance.

Birth Trauma Therapy Works—And You Deserve It

Healing from birth trauma is possible. At Shameless Mama Wellness, I offer birth trauma therapy and EMDR intensives for high-functioning moms who are carrying silent pain.

Through EMDR for birth trauma, we can help your brain process what happened, resolve intrusive thoughts, and reconnect with your body, your baby, and yourself.

Whether you’re seeking a birth trauma therapist near you or looking for postpartum therapy in California, this work can be a turning point—not because it erases your experience, but because it honors it.

You’re Not Broken—You’re a Survivor

Your trauma isn’t imaginary. Your pain is real. And healing is not only possible—it’s your birthright.

You don’t have to keep pretending everything is fine. You’re allowed to grieve what happened. And you deserve a space where shame is not part of the story.

Let’s Talk

If you’re ready to feel safe again in your body and your motherhood, reach out to schedule a consult or learn more about EMDR intensives for birth trauma. I provide virtual postpartum therapy across California, including Los Angeles, San Francisco, Sacramento, and beyond.

You’ve carried enough alone. Let’s begin the work of healing—together.

With Warmth and in Solidarity,
Marilyn

I provide a safe haven to discuss the thoughts you keep hidden.

As a Postpartum Therapist in California, I offer many services utilizing evidence-based treatments. Some services at Shameless Mama Wellness include treatment for postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety, birth trauma therapy, fertility counseling, therapy for miscarriage and loss, pregnancy therapy and treatment for NICU PTSD.

Online therapy available to new moms in California.